And the familial insanity continues...

I was playing a little friendly catching with my little sister when she ran and wrapped the day curtain in my room around herself, "hiding".

"Invisibility Cloak!" I called out, grinning as I walked closer.

And then she unwrapped herself and kicked me in the groin. I fell to the bed. She was understandably apologetic, and ran to get me a bunch of ice wrapped in a double layer of tissue paper for it; I couldn't stop laughing, despite the pain. 

*Aunt walks into our house* 

Aunt: Do you know you left the gate open? 

Mum: Eh? You mean the big one? 

Aunt: Yeah, if not how do you think I came in? Jump over the gate ah. 

Dad: Oh I opened it when I was taking pictures. 

Mum: Go close it la, we don't want rats to come in. 

Dad: Big rats? Haha that can be quite insulting.

Mum: No la, I mean those that scurry in. 

*Much later*

*Uncle comes over*

Aunt: Do you know she called me a rat?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

KYong: Look! Got a lot of ants under your chair!

*ants milling around, picking up some huge crumbs*

Mum: See, they're very hardworking. Must learn from them.

A few seconds later, she's crouching on the floor, a bunch of tissue wadded in each had, vigorously squashing them. *whack* *whack* *whack*

Holding Together

The sweet taste of freedom is something I managed to savor deeply this weekend. I miss the days when I had the time to stand around with friends, not quite sure what to do, standing in the middle of the pathway, standing in the rain, under the shelter of a tree, as we tried to hash out a course of action, inevitably going off-topic before once again meandering our way back on course. The time to take the long route, a stroll through the heart of the city, chatting, whining and in essence being completely random. The time to sit and watch a couple of "performers" in the spotlight at the Gardens, waiting for them to do something, which they never did. The freedom to not have a plan, activities slotted neatly back-to-back, and an unrelenting encik/PS/CSM breathing down our necks to enforce timings and ever ready to knock us down for being too sloppy. The freedom, in fact, to see adveture in the most miniscule yet crazy little things; clambering onto and bypassing a corrugated metal sheet blocking my path and climbing over the low fence at the longkang, creeping across the ledge to bypass yet another sheet; all in order to leave my estate to get to the basketball court across the road with my cousins, and later, moving to look for another court (that one was already occupied) only to discover that the hoops had broken off, and then playing 2 v 2 ultimate frisbee instead. A sweet nectar that I plan to enjoy fully once I ORD.

Staring at the city lights, at people going about the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it struck me how removed from it all we NSmen are. Once we set foot in camp, we assume our second identities, ones which we've conditioned to willingly accept the rigors, regimentation et al of in camp training, and as we go through the week, one event follows another, in rapid succession, no time to think about other things; best not to think about other things. It's scary how easy it is to lose sight of yourself; who you are, what you're doing, the things you stand for; what you're aiming for in life. It's as if we're safely ensconced in a bubble, removed from the flow of everyday life; and I'd hate to think what kind of lost soul would be released when the bubble pops 17 months down the road. I'd cry out for someone to save me, but really, who's up to the task?

Self-help then, is the way to go, and I hope my endeavor to earn a shiny pointy piece of metal serves to focus myself as well.

KYan: Guess what? I got 11th in my class!!
Me (a little asshole I guess): Out of?
KYan: 40! I got top for Chinese
Me (genuinely impressed): Congrats!
KYan: Guess my L1R5?
*random guesses, and she bobs her head ever upwards, till I guess 18*
KYan: You were looking at my head right! It's 11! (Troll much -.-) Guess my Poly L1R5?
*shows 3 fingers*
Me: 3?
KYan: 8 la
Me: Do you want to go poly?
KYan: Yeah
Me: Why?
KYan: Because if I fail JC I'll go poly anyway!
....
*takes the iPad from me and goes off*

Dota 2 (Y)

My hair just got raped by my mum. I guess I shall have to say that I got assaulted by an errant barber on my way to camp =.='"

-----------------------------------------------

Write for me, so that I can understand, write to me, so you know I do too.

But what are words, eh?

I don't think I make much sense these days; it's much like plucking fragments of thought and dumping them here. Without the contextual knowledge, an overall blueprint, it's pretty much impossible to piece them together in any meaningful way.

Strange but true.

I find myself thinking twice now about composing a post during one of my much criticized early mornings; especially if it's the same day as one of our outings, lest I leave some incriminating evidence - in the form of a timestamp - for those epic phail moments where I can simply sleep right past the appointed time and find myself waking up (reluctantly) to the jarring ringing of my phone and a consternation-laden voice on the other end of the line when I tell its owner that I've "overslept, really sorry about it; I'll be there ASAP".

Evidently my iPhone alarm is absolutely useless at waking me up. It either doesn't last long enough; the snooze function doesn't activate; or I've grown particularly adept at turning it off with my eyes closed while not being in a fully conscious state of mind. That totally embarrassing experience last week - with yifan's Go Green project - stands testament to that.

Well, I'm up on time today; so rejoice! (And it wasn't a particularly easy feat to accomplish either!) I'm delaying setting off a little cause I just know you guys won't be on time so yeah... Watched an amazing spectacle this morning, so I'm freaking elated haha. Not bad for the penultimate match before checking into Hotel Tekong.

As a random aside, my sis "idolizes" me apparently, or so my mum says.. Seems like she wrote something about me in her "This I believe in" essay for school. Oh my.

Morning Sounds

I'm sitting in the living room, planted in front of my laptop, when I suddenly hear a noise; a whisper, it seems, calling "korkor".

"Must be KYan, calling from upstairs; she does that, sometimes, after watching her Running Man on the Ipad late into the night."

So I call out to her. No response...

"Okay...might be a once-off thing, shall go back to listening to my music."

*noise repeats*

"Maybe she's not replying to screw with me.."

*noise repeats at regular intervals for next half min*

"Shit..."

I turn to the right, looking towards the main door, down the dark corridor. Nothing. My eyes then stray across my other sis, sleeping sprawled across one of the rattan chairs, just metres from me. The sound seems to be coming from her vicinity. I pay closer attention. "Chey! Just her snoring..."

Whoops haha.

Lestrade: In another life, Mr Holmes, you would have made an excellent criminal
Holmes: Yes, and you an excellent policeman.

Sherlock Holmes (I) was badass and awesome. I can only wish I were as fast (intelligent); and I loved the accent and repartee as well! Quite a good family bonding experience as well; the three of us huddled in front of my brother's laptop; out of necessity, of course, ASUS screens have a notoriously small ideal viewing angle.

Now you know that my nightbirdness runs in the family ;)

"At school nag, at home nag; no peace at all -.-

-KYan

Breached

Oh, by and by; it seems like this sanctuary for my mind has been compromised by The Family. No idea how long this has been happening though.

Can't say I'm very comfortable with this; of having my little sister repeating quotes off here to me, or saying that some of my posts are "So cute". I'm not happy bout it; though I may not sound that way.

Not too sure what I'll be doing about it though; I could uproot myself, put in a password (though that wouldn't deter my brother for long; to him, passwords are merely a challenge to be confronted), limit the audience, lock it completely or simply do nothing at all.

We'll see after the Prelims, though I gain a measure of comfort from knowing that as a result of my second paragraph, all but the last course of action could likely lead to my littlest sister getting pummeled for "ruining everything with her big mouth".

The subconscious countdown ticks. 1. I can't help it, really :)

I'll avoid talking about such pedestrian issues as the degree of screwed-upness for the prelims; since that's a given.


I've managed to spend a little while messing around with Google Gravity which my bro introduced me to. Pretty cool I must say xP Everything falls down to the bottom of the screen; including search results (which are limited, of course) then you can use your mouse to flick them around as you wish! Coolest thing is that it can even sense if you turn your com and automatically make the pieces fall in that direction.
(Obviously engineered) Screenshot of some of my meddling below

 Quite low-res, I know, since I have no idea how to put up a screenshot other than copying over to Paint then scaling down. I'm open to suggestions, if there are any. On Chrome instead of the usual Firefox cause it just felt right. Give it a try if you've got a little time to burn.

I'm finding life at home surprisingly enjoyable. Isn't that lonely since the rest are usually home due to the September hols, and I really appreciate the additional opportunity to mess around with my family (though of course they can get horribly infuriating as well!). The only problem is finding it within myself to sit down and focus all my efforts on work; haven't been all too successful.

Minor bit of drama tonight: My maid saw this suspicious-looking guy loitering at the back of our row of houses from upstairs, so she turned out the lights and kept watch on him. Apparently, he went off; came back 15 mins later with some plastic bag and climbed over the back wall into the house neighbouring ours'. Obviously this was pretty suspicious behaviour; so my bro and me ran out (after ensuring we were suitably clothed; it's damn hot these days -.-) to the back to see what was going on. Trying to be as circumspect as possible, 以免打草惊蛇, we peered into the house and noticed that their back gate was ajar. We also heard the sound of furniture being moved around; "Perhaps by a burglar stumbling around in the dark?" an overactive imagination asked. Since there'd been a burglary at another house awhile ago, my bro (he's the brave, decisive one) made a call to the police to report the incident while the two of us remained watching over the back. Nothing seemed to be happening, though, and after awhile, some guy who was walking his dog passed by and asked us if we were waiting for anyone (we must have looked pretty suspicious, now that I think about it; standing around in the dark). When we answered in the affirmative, he said that he'd seen someone running out from the front towards the bus stop. Well, the Police arrived soon after, and the lights came on as well as my neighbours coincidentally got back at the same time. Statements were taken; and in the end, it seems highly likely that the guy in question was their maid's boyfriend "visiting" her while the owners my neighbours were out. Just a theory though.

Haha, disappointed? Well, I did say "minor", plus epic tales of heroism, 见义勇为ness and so on are only present in movies, books, as well as Primary School compos. So there >.<

Anyway; I'm in the mood for my random thoughts; so I'll just dump them here.

I used to think - perhaps a bit foolishly - that personality didn't matter; since it's possible for an individual to control what he (or she) does; and even control to some extent the way he thinks (read: positive/negative reinforcement for example) and acts. Think, for a very simplistic example, of the "bad guy turned good" trope that is so evident in literature. I'd question what personality actually was; the masks that we put on when we face others? (yes, that's a recurring theme) or the real face beneath. Quite some time back; I even got into an identity crisis of sorts, as I just sat there; mentally peeling back the layers like one might an onion, exfoliating myself; so to speak; and horror of horrors: I "realized" that there was nothing beneath, nothing overtly central or core to myself that was irreducible even when everything else had been stripped away.

A few months on, I think I can say that my thinking has matured. In part because I've associated with a number of "bad" personalities (I hesitate to say "bad people" as I believe that there are no truly bad people; just a whole lot of horribly mistaken ones) and one thing I've realized is that yes, they could easily choose to behave another way; but that it's impossible to judge a person in isolation from his choices. I have so many friends (heh, or maybe not that many); perfectly fine people, usually fun to be with; yet infuriating (to me) in their negativity. At first I'd keep making attempts to encourage them; and it works, for some. But there are those who never seem to change, despite all the effort put in; not only by me, but by others as well. And that kinda forced me to the realization that they're that way because they choose (consciously or not) to be that way. I'm not begrudging them that. I don't even know what the point of me saying this is. Probably simply to say that I really place value on these kinds of choices and cannot overstate the importance I place on them. Choices that determine destiny, or so they say.

And this belief has given me grounding, not only in the way I see others but also on a personal level. Where in the past I used to seek a definitive core pillar of "me-ness" which came out (rather immaturely I feel compelled to add) in so-called "golden rules" which I obstinately refused to violate - such as "To never tell lies" for example, or "To not put my interests before those of others" - simply because I wanted some element to grab ahold of in a world of shifting sand; I now realize (in quite a cliched fashion) that what I was looking for had been under my nose the whole time. That "me" that I seeked? Clearly visible when I'm walking along, see some rubbish on the floor and instinctively pick it up to throw away. Also visible; of course, when I could just as easily walk past some crap on the floor and not do anything about it. No need to make a point to myself by going all out to pick up everything that I come across. The same me who doesn't hesitate to offer help to a friend who seems to need it yet who sighs inwardly as my sister has yet another question she can't do and who somewhat imperiously commands her to come over that she may be enlightened. As I start to really pay attention to the choices I make; the way I react to things, I get a clearer picture of the person I am. And this following of trends in choices rather than the very absolutist way in which I used to carry(?) myself has made life a lot easier to live; way more enjoyable; way more appreciable. I do things because I feel (for whatever reason) like doing them; not to prove a point to myself; or - God forbid - other people. Life's much more open now; where I can say: "I am who I am; flawed, true; truly flawed; but me nonetheless" and only feel apologetic about it if I want to be.

Text wall, right? I'm not quite sure if I make much sense to a third-party, as all this is very much an internal train of thought; running on the convoluted tracks of my sulcus (cheem technical term for the crevices in our brains; thanks Google!). And I'm trying to put this certain view on life into words; which I am patently horrible at doing. Same thing goes for my narrative ability :)

Well, have any of you tried out Google Gravity?

Google detects "unusual traffic from your [my] computer network" apparently, and has seen fit to block my access for much of the day. Way to go, Google (Y) Irrational rage aside, there are some very valid reasons why Google should be feared. As a personal anecdote, my sister used to be a satisfied user of gmail till a few months ago till her account was frozen due to some weird problem regarding her age, and some credit card information as well as personal particulars were demanded to unfreeze it.  Pretty messed up, right? Yet ironically, I'll still continue using gmail, continue to use google as my preferred search engine and blogger for this, cause it's just convenient that way..

Just a thought I had over the weekend:

Life's pretty much a zero-sum game, when you get down to it. Everything we strive to obtain, all those achievements we struggle so hard to...well...achieve; most - if not all - of them come at the expense of someone else. I'm not advocating that we work any less harder to let others have the opportunity; that'd be the height of foolishness, imo, but I do think that an understanding/realization of that point is really important. Armed with this understanding, we "consume" with gratitude, with respect for those whom we deprive, and make full use of what we've gained.

Pretty random, so I just decided to keep it to a short snippet.

On a more humorous note; my sister apparently professed to have dreamt about dropping the iPad while she was asleep. Meta-dreams aside, the hilarious part was when my mum walked in and said that she had actually dropped the iPad. Complete coincidence or calculated attempt to deflect blame? We shall never know xD


Had an awesome dinner at my aunt's house today, cooked by my uncle :D They've got things sorted out so well; a seemingly perfect balance between discipline and freedom the bringing up of my cousins that it's no wonder why I occasionally find myself looking towards them as a "model" family of sorts. Unhealthy comparisons ttm.

And finally; I've broken 6, gushed past 7, and hit 8. I'll get to the double-digits soon!

Because phail is hereditary

Kang Yan: Get away from me or I'll kick you in the crotchet!!!
Me: *rolls eyes*

Heh, I'm spamming some Korean drama now. Baking King FTW. I'll do my work tomorrow, er...I mean today, promise.

Had a randomly fun family outing today. First we went to this field near my house to go fly kite, literally. However, there was scant flying and more crazy running around as we tried to get the kite up into the air. Insufficient string and a kite that I highly suspect was meant purely to be ornamental meant that we did not see much success. In fact, our multiple vain attempts resulting in said kite being dragged in the mud and eventually; being broken apart, so much for its ornamental value =.=

Next was a long drive with no particular destination in mind. We finally decided to go have a look at Marina Bay Sands by way of elimination. Not to the casino though; we do have minors afterall. Just to have a stroll around, take a look at all the shops selling branded goods which I don't expect to grace with my patronage in the course of my natural lifespan, and just see what things were like in general.

And yeah, they have this gigantic bowl positioned over a water feature downstairs, and tourists kept trying to toss coins into the hole in the center. Some coins rolled on edge up the slope, and came rolling down again; back and forth, back and forth. I expected those that didn't go in to just remain in the bowl for collection, but turns out water gushes out of outlets in the sides of the bowl, washing everything downwards. Makes collection of the "tips" pretty darn convenient, doesn't it?

By some freak chance, I happened to run into Sherri at Borders while we were waiting for a free table for lunch/dinner. Being called "Christopher" out of the blue gave me a shock...

Food was nice, mussels in white wine, pumpkin soup, and fish & chips. Mmm.

That's about it, I guess.

Anyway, it's back to school in a couple of days; trainings are gonna be shifted back to the RJ range as well, we've got trials & JAE CCAFeste to deal with, and I'll have symposium training sessions as well. I'm really worried, since I'm pretty sure the trainings will conflict, and I'm still trying to figure out how to deal with it.

The thing about gun allocation is a concern to me as well, I've already had it happen to me last year, and I don't want a repeat now, of all times, especially when I'm trying to nail everything down, build up some consistency. I don't want my hammer to be taken away from me just as I'm getting used to it. I'm not saying that I couldn't live without it, of course. I'd hammer this nail in with my bare hands if necessary; just saying that I'd love it if I get to keep this hammer, for once. DX

Lemonade

Merry Christmas everyone! Haha my crazy sister got it in her head to make these "Christmas peanuts" from some similar thing with walnuts in this show, so she took some peanut shells, stuffed some random message inside and super-glued the halves together again >.<

Boxing Day (Fail knowledge of holiday nomenclature..) Christmas Eve was pretty ok. Went with Clarissa to deliver some Christmas gifts to our interviewee at Dairy Farm Road. She was really quite late, so luckily I'm very good at amusing myself: I took a walk down Dairy Farm Quarry and saw some animals, a few of which I even recognized! A pair of cute baby long-tailed macaques, a lesser racket-tailed drongo, assorted moths and butterflies and what I think was a variable squirrel which ran right across the trail in front of me. I really enjoyed myself, and found it very peaceful. Something about the coolness of the air, and the natural sounds surrounding me XD.
The only problem was that even after taking my time with the trail, I still finished before she reached...so I stoned on a stone for quite some time.

Talking to Mr Leong was interesting, since you can tell he's really passionate about nature and wanting to preserve it in Singapore. He's very nice too, and gave us a copy of NSS's publication:
Singapore Waters - Unveiling Our Seas, which has a lot of interesting information about our marine biodiversity.

A little disappointing when things don't turn out quite as expected, especially when you so looked forward to it, but that's life I guess haha.

I put a little more effort into organizing the class gathering. I should think I've managed to message the whole class, and most of them have responded already. The turnout rate looks like it's going to be quite good!

Dinner with my family was enjoyable.

That's it! Merry Christmas to all, and really; I feel that so long as we set our minds to something, anything, we'll manage it, somehow. That's what I'm feeling now.