So maybe I've had a little too much to drink at Yifan's birthday celebration. Vodka is freaking awesome. Initially left a warm burning sensation down my throat, but subsequent cups downed with ice left a refreshingly cool yet warm buzz all over :D (I just might be a happy drunk; there's still hope!) Had a pretty good time there too, and I'm horribly impressed by how hospitable he was, cooking some awesome Chinese food himself and in general the way he handled the whole thing. I really enjoyed the opportunity to catch up with some old friends as well. Always good to hear things from a different perspective; a fresh breath of air and all that.

Ah nevermind, there's nothing much to say, really. It's saddening, this dearth of meaning. Kinda makes me want to do something, anything, for an infusion into my life. In fact, I'm probably checking into IMH next Sat, which isn't as bad as I'm intentionally making it sound, of course, and I'll have to get myself up to speed with regards to uni apps and all that nonsense. It's horrible having to deal with these things at the very moment when I find myself bereft of motivation, a little depressed, maybe, and having to deal with the last few weeks of life as a specialist cadet. Life in camp is really routine, can be a little frustrating, and is ultimately consuming. It doesn't allow much time for distraction, and demands much of the attention and energy I have to give, precluding extraneous thoughts and leaving me not much spirit at the end of the week, or even at the end of a day at work, during my rest hours to focus towards the more "significant" endeavors. My brain refuses to work properly, which doesn't exactly help either :/

Guess I can no longer wait for life to "move on", bogged down as it is by this mess that is NS. Instead, I've gotta take the initiative and make things happen, not simply allow them to happen to me, eh?

I've come to realize that time and awkwardness do nothing to come between an earnest and sincere relationship (most generic term possible). If you genuinely want me to be/remain part of your life, and make it possible, that's where I'll be. And I'll make room for you as well. Pretty simple, when laid out like that. I want to put in the effort to do so, and not let people who I really enjoyed spending time with become mere "corridor friends" inhabiting the halls of memory.