A Year On

It's the 1 year mark. Looking back, I suppose I've come a long way from that first day, boarding the Penguin to sunny Tekong "resort" for the very first time. I've changed, as I've commented so many times, and yet some parts remain the same, as I'm made aware of (painfully so) at times.

I'm experiencing a fair bit of nostalgia, reviewing the events of the past year; not the year 2012 but rather the year in NS, though the two seem irretractably linked in my mind. It's been eventful, to say the least; most marked was the transition from civilian to soldier, the giving up of many personal freedoms, epitomized at that time by the surrendering of my pink IC (oh how I miss you, messed up fringe in the pic and all) and receiving the 11B in return, a horrible trade in all ways. Regimentation and discipline-wise, I remember how crappy I was at my drills at first, and simply getting used to staying and sharing my life with many other guys, and dealing with so many competing egos. It was always a pain to arrange my stuff to pretty exacting standards, and being made to conform was (and still is) an uncomfortable feeling. Learning weapon handling, live-firings, outfield, receiving that letter which I'll never forget, that desperate shellscrape day, that horrible night atop the hill in the middle of a lightning storm torrential rain, huddled together for comfort, that triumphant passing out parade, all memorable.

Life's different nowadays, now that it's settled into the pace of normalcy, and it's gotten...dare I say...unexciting? And a little laborious at times too. At this 1 year milestone, I find myself perhaps inevitably counting down the weeks as they pass, every Friday's a blessing, and while Sunday night is a little disappointing, we're that much closer to those revered three letters. I find it a little sad that I don't look forward to much anymore, but an interesting side effect is that without something to look forward to, I find myself looking at things alot closer, making my private observations, taking notes. It's interesting and enlightening, sometimes heartening, others depressing, but a useful little exercise nonetheless xP It's for such things I guess that I'm not writing off the next 10 months altogether, so on with it!

To be very frank though, I've too easily let myself be completely absorbed into the NS life, often to the point of neglecting all thought of what's happening outside, as well as letting certain events dictate my mood. Working on maintaining a balance between distancing myself and doing a good job will be the main task for the remaining 45% :)